Friday, 21 December 2007

Farewell Ebrahim,farewell

Dearest darling Ebrahim,
Why? Why Ebrahim Why ? Couldn't you have waited a little longer. Did the world fall short of space for you? Or were you too incomprehensible for this universe? Maybe the latter.

My heart is still only cries Ebrahim ...searching for you. Come back sweetheart,come back.
You always wanted the world to remember you as 'somebody who not just lived, but showed the real way to live'. Now what does the world have to remember?

The Silence is eating onto me. When they said you died-I called you up, again and again. Wanted to hear you chuckle in that infamous way, saying, "Caught ya." Couldn't this have been one of your pranks? My folks remember you as the prankster. My ma cried like my daughter for you.

What am i supposed to do with all the times we shared Ebrahim? The hours of non-sense chit-chat, your sexcapdes, your girlfriends, your life, your misery?You gave me my first bike ride. You took me out on my first car drive. You gave me my first designer perfume. Not a single birthday of mine have you missed. Now who do I count on to surprise me? We have spent drunk moments on Worli sea face talking of OSHO. Shee!You loved that sick bastard and his fuck all philosophies,but i heard them all for you. I tried and played my part. Or not? How do i even know that,now that yr not here.
When they said you killed yourself,my world stopped. it felt like someone cut off my hands.

I wish you could have seen your mother in her misery-yelling and crying out to Allah to give her her piece of her heart back and she would ask no more- or your sister who kept saying "Bhai, bhai" in her stupor.
What have you left each of us with Ebrahim? We don't want it, we want YOU.

You left your story incomplete pal. Its time for us to pen down the rest.

It takes a lot to choose to be different and you had the courage. You were never a victim of religious banterings,n all friends knew that. You had a heart, only a few knew before knowing you as 'the brat'. You would give a hand and a leg for your mother and sister,they meant the world to you. You always brought a smile onto a wrinkled face, remembered the forgotten people. You cared, my friend, you did. And you did not let anyone know,thats what made you a great guy.

I shall never know the answers to why you hanged yourself. But I do know that I will always miss you. That it will be very hard to make a trip to Pune, when I could not have done it for you. That I forgave you years ago for acting stupid with me.

You're free Ebrahim ,free from all bondage. Sing a song with the angels and tell me which one you liked the most*winks. I'll wait for your call....Farewell


Sexy Irene a.k.a Moti

Monday, 17 December 2007

Hallucinating Angel

I'm sittin at my desk-bored,confused,irritated and worst- sad.

To lose a part of you could be the worst feelin ever to experience. Nothing you can do to make it go away-no bantering, no raving, no sleeping,no dreaming.

Tears don tell my tales no more. A shadow of me I have become.

To dream to get what you long for and then long to wake up in reality. Is this a joke?Maybe. Cos everyone seems to be laughing.

I want to laugh again, make me laugh.

Put me to sleep, let me dream.Another dream,please.

Saturday, 8 December 2007

Dizzle Dazzle,Hiccups Uninterrupted....

Empty spaces, black faces,
Shadow smiles, wispy images,
Smoke rings, BLANK me.

Faded dreams, staggering footsteps,
Mumble, to me,
Drowning voices, silent screams,
Colours of the world.

A world of my own,
Reality fading to my world,
Losing my balance,
Tipping my glass off,
One more peg-I need it.

I need to see my world,
My colours, my dreams,
I need to get lost,
I need my sweet cauldron of pain.

Groping for hope,
Helping hands to hold me,
Lift my head to see clearly,
No one i see,
But the shadow of me.

Pour me that glass,
Sink in that feeling,
Thru' smothered whispers and
Empty glasses of wine,
I say to myself,
"Ooh baby! I'm doing fine."