Saturday 26 May 2007

Fossilized memories


Seven days ago i seen the reality of life.I'm glad i did,jus wen i was abt to sit n analyse hw important it is to conform to the norms of this world,in order to live a suitable life!I wonder if i wd hv realised it all by merely skimming thru the ochre pages of a well written novel,perhaps a best seller or jus flicking the remote button to hear wise nuthings to mk sense of yr self.

I turned 23 abt 23 days ago{well i startd writin dis pc a day b4:)},n i tot i hit it like big time...ppl,moments,gifts,yrs all amalgamated into one cloud of hope dat stayed wid me fer dat day..."woohoo" i screamt in my lil head,not empty i assure u,"im an old lady."hehehe...or was i still waitin fer another bday wisher to tell me otherwise?with the years come the eternal reminders of blissful youth in a not so appealin manner frm yr mother who subtly slips the fact of marriage...it got me thinkin-wat do i need to assure tht my ageing or eternal youthful assurance stays perfectly normal with my thinkin n insecurities?Yes,this is one truth i NEVER share.i'm mortally afraid of wrinkles n crows feet,for dat matter even spectacles...n the last thg u need is yr maternal n paternal aunts whackin the marriage crap into u to mk u understd dat old age(n my undisclosed fear) wd be really bearable wid a companion...
Sunday morning,the early sun shone its way into the living room of the octogenarian Effie Carvalho.Vacuous eyes told a tale of strength and hope and of a lady, who breathed french into everythg she dvelved in.Sitting like in a state of rigour motur,I watched those same eyes that looked at me lk a stranger.I knew of Effie's condition even wen i was tutored by her.But a good teacherr aint worth cheatin,the loss is always yrs...I sat there introducing myself to her as if for the first time.In response i got the vapid look...the maid looked at me as if i was wasting my tim...she was employed full time for the old lady,tho aunt edna,who took me bk home to effie,was happy to play dumb wid me...Her son,one of the twins,was down frm abroad performin the sunday ritual of cleaning the house.He walked past by several times,making me feel comfortable n one wid the furniture,besides his mother who stared aimlessly at the television set displayin a non-descript hindi movie.Nevertheless,i went on wid the usual jabber of my life n then onto the tuition days where i reminded her of her late beloved pulling her legs durin classes...
The carvalhos were a content family of 2 girls,the twin brothers and a diabetic father,now no more.Baylon carvalho always said,"My wife shall forget my name,my daily doses n probbly her name too,but she can never,damn it! forget tht french of hers."This was the constant cribbing of her husband during the french tutions i used to take from her.
The lady who made sure i din forget a word,today was sitting before me not gettin get a word of what i was sayin.an awkward silent moment passed by not until an aged voice in the room spoke..."are you dominic's grandchild?my cousin delphine's grand-daughter?"barring my frozen shock,wre the frozen figurees of the rest present in the room.All that moved were was her carcked lips while her son,sis-in-law n maid looked at nana teary-eyed.It was effie's first recollection.i suppose in years since i left 5yrs ago.apparently,she din remmbr nethg nt even her own.As i left the place,promisin to return bk,thnkful eyes greeted my way out hopin dat i wd keep up to it,moreso fer themselves...
did effie knw dat her son was der jus to see his mother remmbr him fer one las time before she closed her eyes?dat he gv up his time to be wid her?dat her loved ones still cared for her to live on as long as she cd, the way she cd.n all dat effie remmbered was her beloved n,ofcourse French....
I walked bk home.thinkin abt all dat happ.no,i wasnt considerin spendin the rest of my life as a wise decision of my bday naggin...but,yes the wrinkles wd be worth adorning for that one 'beloved'........And 23 will do jus fine...